Health Update: Health Update: I’ve been a spa expert for 25 years. Here’s what works (and what doesn’t) – What Experts Say– What Experts Say.
Full disclosure: I never actually wanted to write about spas. Originally I was employed by The Sunday Times as its travel news reporter and was happily going about my who, what, when, where, why business when a focus group suggested our travel coverage should include something more “pampering and girlie” (please don’t judge, this was 25 years ago and Britney Spears was topping the charts).
At that time my fellow travel writers were predominantly male and in training to be the next Paul Theroux. They wanted to climb Everest without oxygen and cross the Sahara with only a thimbleful of water. “Somebody’s going to have to cover … spas,” the deputy editor said in disbelief. They were more likely to donate a kidney to a stranger, so I ended up with the gig.
It’s not that I was averse to the idea. I like some TLC as much as the next person, but back then it was hard to take spas seriously. They were little more than extensions of department store beauty counters. When the news hack in me asked for proof that its miracle cream was indeed miraculous, spa managers would simply point to the product’s advertising tagline. I despaired.
Thankfully, within a couple of years things started to change. Spas began working with nutritionists and personal trainers. Gradually they recruited doctors and introduced medical testing. The science-backed wellness evolution was underway. I was hooked and considerably healthier (I haven’t had a cold in well over 20 years and never tested positive for Covid).
Post-pandemic, we’re all more interested in being healthy and appreciate that holidays are the optimum time to establish new routines.
That’s where this column comes in. In the past 25 years I’ve visited thousands of health-focused resorts worldwide. It’s definitely not a one-size-fits-all industry. I’ve watched in amazement at how spas with wildly different approaches can nevertheless deliver meaningful results for the right person.
Holidays are a great time to establish a new routine
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Choosing wisely is definitely the key to success. For some, a gentle yoga retreat where it doesn’t get much more technical than lighting an incense stick will provide the necessary headspace. Others will thrive under the guidance of fun-loving instructors at a fitness bootcamp — “Sweat is your fat crying,” is my favourite motivational one-liner — while cynics might respond better to the cold, hard data delivered by a white coat at a state-of-the-art medi-spa.
• Read our full guide to spa and wellness breaks
Deciding which is the right style for you is becoming an ever more complicated process. According to the Global Wellness Institute, the worldwide wellness economy is on course to be worth $9 trillion (£6.7 trillion) by 2028 (nearly doubling in size since 2019) and it feels like every hotel is jumping on the bandwagon and touting a unique wellbeing concept that will save your life. In some cases all they really have is a sauna, a cold plunge, a therapist who did a weekend course in reiki and whale music, and a very enthusiastic marketing team.
It’s easy to be bewildered and even deterred by the brandspeak. At the moment the spa world is pitting longevity against wellness. Which one is best? For the record, they’re essentially two sides of the same coin. A wellness philosophy is rooted in holistic natural therapies and lifestyle elements such as nutrition and sleep hygiene, whereas longevity is science-based, biometric-driven and centred on lengthening your health span. In practice, however, at most good spas the two disciplines are increasingly overlapping and you’ll have a bit of both in your programme.
What most spas have in common is that they’re not cheap, and you don’t want to make an expensive mistake. Over the years I’ve made schoolgirl errors so you don’t have to. A hay bath in Italy was a particularly low point. Apparently steaming in the finest Alpine pastures boosts the immune system and mood, and it’s true I did emerge after 20 minutes feeling blissfully happy — though mainly because I wasn’t soaking in a vat of ticklish hay any more.
Meanwhile my first “healing” session in Bali went like this. Therapist: “You’re feeling energetic heat now.” Me: “I’m so sorry, but I’m not.” Therapist: “Yes, you are.” Me: “No, I’m really not.” That verbal ping-pong lasted the entire session, a whole 60 minutes I’ll never get back.
Spa breaks can make for very expensive holidays
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I was equally sceptical about my first breathwork class in Los Angeles and yet it was a revelation. I now rely on controlled breathing to calm myself in stressful situations (as do the US Navy Seals) and even to tackle jet lag. Likewise, watsu is billed as a relaxing, pool-based treatment during which your limbs are stretched by a therapist as you float. Admittedly it sounds like an expensive alternative to an hour on a Lilo, but it is as refreshing as a good night’s sleep.
I’m going to be honest about therapies I think are fads. I’ve never felt any benefits from an IV drip, for example, and while hyperbaric chambers may be effective in certain circumstances such as treating severe wounds, I remain unconvinced that an averagely healthy person notices any particular difference.
• Revealed: The World’s 50 Best Spas
Expensive detox clinics are also in my sights: unless you have a serious medical condition, your liver, kidneys, lungs and skin are already doing a perfectly good job of getting rid of toxins from your body. Of course, if you eat next to nothing for a week, cut out alcohol, refined sugars and processed foods, you will lose weight and look better, but there’s no need to be so extreme. Dietician-led menus at reputable spas achieve the same results while serving you three delicious meals a day and allowing you to have the energy to enjoy yourself — and they’re often cheaper than the starvation spas too.
I’ll help you navigate this crowded market and get maximum bang for your buck by only reviewing places that have well-researched, evidence-based programmes and employ experienced therapists. The aim is that you’ll feel so good you’ll be ready for anything, even climbing Everest.
This month…
• I had my first AI-assisted spa treatment, a state-of-the-art ECG at Buff Medical Resort in Germany, with AI detecting discrepancies in my graph that are invisible to the naked eye, comparing it with a data set of 60,000-plus and delivering results in seconds (buff-medical-resort.com).
• I’m eating Dirtea Tremella Gummies to counter winter dryness — they’re more hydrating than a Cleopatra milk bath (dirteaworld.com).
• And I’m counting down to the spring launch of Tramp Health. The naughty London nightclub is opening a wellness club in Grosvenor Square and I’m intrigued to see how swapping red ropes for battle ropes works.